I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
