we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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