I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
i'm home, then i'll come over
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
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he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
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I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.