This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
