you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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