Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
You took a bar mat shot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
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