remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
