I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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