I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Randomize
