oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
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Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
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