her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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