You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
