Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I am midnight drunk by noon
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
So vagazzling was a success
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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