his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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