Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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