New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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