It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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