I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize