Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Randomize