How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
