I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
She just used a chaser for red wine.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
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apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
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I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
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