What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Randomize
