Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
