Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize
