Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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