My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
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