You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Randomize
