i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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