do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Randomize
