just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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