Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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