I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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