Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize