I wanna bring you to show and tell
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I love how my cats smell like pot.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
