I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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