So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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