when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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