i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
