You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Randomize