Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Randomize
