My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
where does the pee come out of this thing
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
I had to cum in my sink.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
