his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Randomize
