That's intense
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
