That's intense
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
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