saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
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