Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
