oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Panties = found
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