fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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