That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
it's great music for shaving your balls
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Randomize
