If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
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