Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
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